I am cutting out people who are angry from my sacred spiritual essence. Let me explain. Anger is a natural emotion in our many emotional arrays we pull from to express what is going on within us and/or around us. I have nothing against anger; it can be a great catalyst for action to occur for better or worse. Hopefully for the better.
What I'm talking about is the person that walks in perpetual anger immobilizing them to evolve for the better. That constant "dark" cloud over their head, never seeing the rainbow through the storms. The person whose words only cut like a knife at the heartless expense of someone else's mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being and upliftment thinking in the same breath they are doing you a favor in helping you see the "error" of your ways. The person who can walk into a room of happy collective cooperative faces only to have its occupants mentally and emotionally hijacked because that angry person felt the need to "express themselves" in a hostile, combative, bullying method because they feel the need to teach the "weak-minded sheep" that their way is your salvation in the angry person's self-ASSumed Saviour complex.
Those angry people remind me of the Twilight Zone episode where a revolutionary started out with the best intentions of uplifting his people, when power was given to him, he in turned became the very terror/dictator he sought to destroy. Even willing to kill those (family, friends, comrads, etc.) he lived and grew up with because they did not agree with his philosophy and ways being. The human mind can become so perverted when anger and a sense of entitlement are combined. When left unchecked that angry person will become the very thing they've despised so much: the self-fulfilling prophecy.
I choose to stay guarded up and remove those energies from by being. To the angry people...you can put that where? back there...deuces
Thursday, August 11, 2011
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Monday, August 8, 2011
Unlearning Being a Man
I am at a quandary...well maybe not quandary...but I have recently got back into dating...I've met some duds and some okay guys...I am currently talking to a really nice guy that I had clicked with immediately. We are taking it slow because we want this to be something that we go into with both eyes open (keeping fingers, eyes, toes, etc. crossed that we make it).
In our budding relationship, I am realizing that I have been in the habit of being both a woman and a man in everything I did in my past relationships. I act like a man sometimes, and I don't even realize it. My circumstances had forced me to be that way and also for a lot of women that I know. Just to give some insight into what I'm saying. I have seen women having to do for themselves, because they didn't have the help and support of their mates to help take some of the burden off of their shoulders. These women are in my family, they are my neighbors, friends, etc. This was and is a sad norm in my reality. Fellas I'm NOT saying all men are like this, I'm only talking about my personal experiences...if you are feeling some kind of way about this blog then maybe you are one of those men and may need to re-evaluate what you want for yourself, your family and your community.
Growing up as a child, the idea of relationships were the woman (my mother included) held down the house, the job, the kids, etc. even if they had a boyfriend or husband. I'm pretty old-fashioned when it comes to family dynamics: marriage, mom, dad, child(ren) all togther in one household. I'd wanted the partnership my grandparents had. I've tried not to be what I saw growing up, but sadly I have been put in that position that others before me have been.
I hope someday this changes and will be an exception for the next generation of little girls and boys growing up behind us. That will take my generation and older generations to take a long hard look at ourselves in the mirror to fix this since we are the examples that our babies are following, but that is another subject matter to go further into in another blog.
Being in this new relationship, it is bringing this "quandary" to my attention. I am for once allowed to be the "gentler sex" with this man. I am trying to figure out what that means to me and to us as we grow together. When I see him, I see someone that does not second guess that he is a man. Not saying that men don't know they are men, but with him I see someone who knows what he wants and will do what it takes to have the things his family will need. He is NOT the type to ask a woman to take care of him like he's a child (example: asking for spending money, a place to stay, etc.). There is a self-assured confidence with him that I have not seen in my previous relationships where the guy would tell me that they are the man, but I've had to feel like a parent to them for their decisions that have put me in survival mode.
Some of the things he does is he makes sure that I walk on the inside part of the sidewalk; he'll even move me back when I start to wander near the street...LOL...he even tells me it's okay to let go of the control when he sees concern in my face. He understands why I had to be that way. I don't have to be that with him, because he shows me that he has things under control. He even calms my fears by telling me my fears out loud to know that he was listening to me. So now I am relearning what partnership means for us and consciously telling myself it okay to need him as well as want him. You don't have to do everything by yourself. It's okay to be vulernable and to have that knight in shining armor to protect you. Like any other habit this will be a work in progress that I will learn to incoporate into my pysche. He is helping me to be more aware when I'm stepping into the Men's Zone :-)
NOTE: This is not about being submissive for either party but for us to look at redefining partnership that will be conducive to the couple and the family dynamic...there is no right or wrong way to know what best works you for...this is my personal walk that maybe helpful with others in their journey as well.
In our budding relationship, I am realizing that I have been in the habit of being both a woman and a man in everything I did in my past relationships. I act like a man sometimes, and I don't even realize it. My circumstances had forced me to be that way and also for a lot of women that I know. Just to give some insight into what I'm saying. I have seen women having to do for themselves, because they didn't have the help and support of their mates to help take some of the burden off of their shoulders. These women are in my family, they are my neighbors, friends, etc. This was and is a sad norm in my reality. Fellas I'm NOT saying all men are like this, I'm only talking about my personal experiences...if you are feeling some kind of way about this blog then maybe you are one of those men and may need to re-evaluate what you want for yourself, your family and your community.
Growing up as a child, the idea of relationships were the woman (my mother included) held down the house, the job, the kids, etc. even if they had a boyfriend or husband. I'm pretty old-fashioned when it comes to family dynamics: marriage, mom, dad, child(ren) all togther in one household. I'd wanted the partnership my grandparents had. I've tried not to be what I saw growing up, but sadly I have been put in that position that others before me have been.
I hope someday this changes and will be an exception for the next generation of little girls and boys growing up behind us. That will take my generation and older generations to take a long hard look at ourselves in the mirror to fix this since we are the examples that our babies are following, but that is another subject matter to go further into in another blog.
Being in this new relationship, it is bringing this "quandary" to my attention. I am for once allowed to be the "gentler sex" with this man. I am trying to figure out what that means to me and to us as we grow together. When I see him, I see someone that does not second guess that he is a man. Not saying that men don't know they are men, but with him I see someone who knows what he wants and will do what it takes to have the things his family will need. He is NOT the type to ask a woman to take care of him like he's a child (example: asking for spending money, a place to stay, etc.). There is a self-assured confidence with him that I have not seen in my previous relationships where the guy would tell me that they are the man, but I've had to feel like a parent to them for their decisions that have put me in survival mode.
Some of the things he does is he makes sure that I walk on the inside part of the sidewalk; he'll even move me back when I start to wander near the street...LOL...he even tells me it's okay to let go of the control when he sees concern in my face. He understands why I had to be that way. I don't have to be that with him, because he shows me that he has things under control. He even calms my fears by telling me my fears out loud to know that he was listening to me. So now I am relearning what partnership means for us and consciously telling myself it okay to need him as well as want him. You don't have to do everything by yourself. It's okay to be vulernable and to have that knight in shining armor to protect you. Like any other habit this will be a work in progress that I will learn to incoporate into my pysche. He is helping me to be more aware when I'm stepping into the Men's Zone :-)
NOTE: This is not about being submissive for either party but for us to look at redefining partnership that will be conducive to the couple and the family dynamic...there is no right or wrong way to know what best works you for...this is my personal walk that maybe helpful with others in their journey as well.
Saturday, August 6, 2011
Walking the Road of Spirit
In my spiritual journey in this present lifetime, it's so important to have the connection to the spirit world (Goddess/God Energy, Ancestor connections, Earth and Cosmic connections). These connections play a huge role in our place in physical and ethereal worlds. Meditation/prayer is the means to connect and bridge them. Through meditation/prayer we open ourselves to messages to be received and to feel the energy that constantly surrounds us.
These connections play a very important role in rituals. When we are connected to the spirit world, we can pull from those energies to assist us in the physical world. Ritual is the physical manifestation that bridges the physical and spiritual world. You can work with spellcasting, candle magic, trancing, etc. There are rituals that are established through working with a coven or practicing african or native american traditional religions. But you can create your own ritual as well especially if you are a solitary witch. Ritual work is mostly spirit connection and intention. I follow my spirit and listen to messages from my angels/spiritual guides to help me in ritual magic.
I believe in also mentoring with more established psychics/spiritualists because working with the spiritual world is great but it could be dangerous to your mental, emotional, and physical well-being if your are new to it and accidentally open a Pandora's box. You don't want to open a door where a malevolent spirit may want to do you harm. Just as there are good and bad people in the physical world, there are good and bad spirits in the ethereal world. Make sure you are guarded up and protected when you open those connections. You don't want to chance spiritual attacks.
I do believe in karmic energy or balance energy so intention is very important. If you mean to do harm to others be prepared for the karmic energy to balance the ritual meaning things may go wrong in your life or you may receive negative energy within you to manifest outside of you for the intention to be manifested in ritual.
Connecting to spirit helps us to feel our closeness with the Creator, to see our purpose, answer questions we may have, give us peace of mind, etc. Trust in the Goddess/God energy, your spirit, your guides/angels they give us want we need to help us grow spiritually. For me, there is no one stop shop for how to do rituals, the best advice given to me was trust your spirit it will not do you harm. If you should choose to join a coven or become initiated into a traditional religion or be solitary follow what you feel is best for you in your journey. Good Luck
These connections play a very important role in rituals. When we are connected to the spirit world, we can pull from those energies to assist us in the physical world. Ritual is the physical manifestation that bridges the physical and spiritual world. You can work with spellcasting, candle magic, trancing, etc. There are rituals that are established through working with a coven or practicing african or native american traditional religions. But you can create your own ritual as well especially if you are a solitary witch. Ritual work is mostly spirit connection and intention. I follow my spirit and listen to messages from my angels/spiritual guides to help me in ritual magic.
I believe in also mentoring with more established psychics/spiritualists because working with the spiritual world is great but it could be dangerous to your mental, emotional, and physical well-being if your are new to it and accidentally open a Pandora's box. You don't want to open a door where a malevolent spirit may want to do you harm. Just as there are good and bad people in the physical world, there are good and bad spirits in the ethereal world. Make sure you are guarded up and protected when you open those connections. You don't want to chance spiritual attacks.
I do believe in karmic energy or balance energy so intention is very important. If you mean to do harm to others be prepared for the karmic energy to balance the ritual meaning things may go wrong in your life or you may receive negative energy within you to manifest outside of you for the intention to be manifested in ritual.
Connecting to spirit helps us to feel our closeness with the Creator, to see our purpose, answer questions we may have, give us peace of mind, etc. Trust in the Goddess/God energy, your spirit, your guides/angels they give us want we need to help us grow spiritually. For me, there is no one stop shop for how to do rituals, the best advice given to me was trust your spirit it will not do you harm. If you should choose to join a coven or become initiated into a traditional religion or be solitary follow what you feel is best for you in your journey. Good Luck
Friday, August 5, 2011
Facing the Fear
I faced a fear of mine today: THE CHIROPRACTOR
They have always scared me. The idea of having someone "crack" your back didn't seem like an enjoyable thought to experience. I get squeamish when I see people pop their knuckles...LOL...but pain has made me overcome my fear.
The chiropractor that I went to was pleasant, calm, and took away my fears by explaining everything he does and made me partner in the process of getting better again. I do feel better and I look forward to a complete recovery. Lesson learned today: Face your fears or live in agony.
Happy Friday!
They have always scared me. The idea of having someone "crack" your back didn't seem like an enjoyable thought to experience. I get squeamish when I see people pop their knuckles...LOL...but pain has made me overcome my fear.
The chiropractor that I went to was pleasant, calm, and took away my fears by explaining everything he does and made me partner in the process of getting better again. I do feel better and I look forward to a complete recovery. Lesson learned today: Face your fears or live in agony.
Happy Friday!
Full Circle? Maybe, Maybe Not
I bought my first rosary recently after years of deciding I was no longer a christian. It felt like the right thing to do for me at this time in my life. That rosary represents my spirituality throughtout my present lifetime. I've been still and follow where my spirit guides me instead of me trying to tell it what I think is right for it. I sometimes forget that my soul has lived many lifetimes and is wiser than what my physical mind thinks it is.
I wear my rosary beads (and yes I still remember how to pray the rosary after all of these years...some things are just engrained into our minds) as a reminder that I am a spiritual being learning myself in the present time and journey. Christianity was my first conscious foundation of being introduced to something that was bigger than my existence...I don't hate it anymore...it's like having parents that have faults but in their imperfections the truth about LOVE is still present in the message no matter how much human beings will try to distort the message...LOVE cannot be hidden in the words of the Creator (Goddess/God Energy) of us all.
Christianity was the foundation that has contributed to the person I am today. I have built from that foundation to grow and explore others way of spiritual growth in this lifetime...I will always seek to be my better self and to show love to others and the world that was given to us. In my continuous spiritual and religious journeys, I believe I can be any label I want to be where my spirit sees fit. The soul is limitless and timeless. I don't have to prove my spirituality to anyone...that relationship is between me and the Creator just as your spiritual journey is yours. As that old saying goes "All Roads Lead to Rome." All paths will lead to the Creator. Happy Journey
I wear my rosary beads (and yes I still remember how to pray the rosary after all of these years...some things are just engrained into our minds) as a reminder that I am a spiritual being learning myself in the present time and journey. Christianity was my first conscious foundation of being introduced to something that was bigger than my existence...I don't hate it anymore...it's like having parents that have faults but in their imperfections the truth about LOVE is still present in the message no matter how much human beings will try to distort the message...LOVE cannot be hidden in the words of the Creator (Goddess/God Energy) of us all.
Christianity was the foundation that has contributed to the person I am today. I have built from that foundation to grow and explore others way of spiritual growth in this lifetime...I will always seek to be my better self and to show love to others and the world that was given to us. In my continuous spiritual and religious journeys, I believe I can be any label I want to be where my spirit sees fit. The soul is limitless and timeless. I don't have to prove my spirituality to anyone...that relationship is between me and the Creator just as your spiritual journey is yours. As that old saying goes "All Roads Lead to Rome." All paths will lead to the Creator. Happy Journey
Next Step
I'm trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up again. I do know that I don't want to be in the corporate arena for too long. My free-spiritedness is starting to rebel against my practical sensibilities. It wants its turn to shine. Circus performer, mime, make-up artist, anything that will nourish the creative side of me. The corporate world is okay...it provides for one's needs as well as one's wants.
I'm not knocking anyone that enjoys working in corporate america. I know some of my fellow coworkers who enjoy what they do and are happy there. But for me, I was always an eclectic soul that does not like to be boxed into any category. I am metamorphosing into another butterfly ready to fly in a different direction.
I was visiting a quaint little town in Bucks County PA...one of the features was a ghost tour. I saw how our tour guide's eyes glowed as she talked about all of the hauntings that have occurred in the town. She really loved what she did and I saw the passion in her eyes. I've been thinking about her lately...I think I people pop into our lives for a reason. She showed me that it's never too late to start over and to find something I'm passionate about and make a living from it.
Carpe Diem!
I'm not knocking anyone that enjoys working in corporate america. I know some of my fellow coworkers who enjoy what they do and are happy there. But for me, I was always an eclectic soul that does not like to be boxed into any category. I am metamorphosing into another butterfly ready to fly in a different direction.
I was visiting a quaint little town in Bucks County PA...one of the features was a ghost tour. I saw how our tour guide's eyes glowed as she talked about all of the hauntings that have occurred in the town. She really loved what she did and I saw the passion in her eyes. I've been thinking about her lately...I think I people pop into our lives for a reason. She showed me that it's never too late to start over and to find something I'm passionate about and make a living from it.
Carpe Diem!
Thursday, August 4, 2011
Is There Anybody Else Like Me
I am a witch. I know that's a straight in your face introduction...LOL...I'd figure what the hell. How many times do I get a chance to introduce myself in that fashion when I'm meeting people.
I am a multiracial (African, Native American, and Middle Eastern) witch which can make for an interesting blend of beliefs that I hold for myself. I am a solitary multiracial eclectic witch to be more exact. Still trying to figure out the eclectic part...is that the hippie, tree-hugging spirit that I possess...idk...oh well...if having a strong connection to the spirit of Mama Earth and the Universe or Multiverses is eclectic then yes I am.
I am trying to find my place in this lifetime. I sometimes feel like a square amongst round circles or a circle amongst squares depending on what side of the bed I get out of in the morning. How did I know I was a witch? I think I knew I was different when I started being aware of my own existence as a child. I was a "weird" little one. I was told by family that I lived in my head a lot. It was hard to reach me at times. My imgaination was my connection to the spirit world, but I didn't know that at the time. As children, we are emotional and visual...we see it and feel it as it is...our communication to the world is far different than how we communicate as adults with extensive complex vocabulary. Children communicate through feeling because the spirit is still connected to Source energy (Goddess/God Energy).
I would see spirits like I would see anyone else in a room. I remember as a child a woman dressed in white would look over my brother and I as we slept. She never spoke just looked at us. I didn't feel fear; I was just curious about her. I'd also dreamed about people and situations. I'd even dreamed the death of my beloved grandmother. My mother started to tell me to keep things to myself out of her own sanity and also to protect me from being made fun of or misunderstood. It was hard to fit into any family or school dynamic when people in your immediate circle don't have these "strange" occurrences. My love of books introduced me to withcraft. I was 8 years old when I had a word for what I felt like: WITCH. Those stories that I would read about the supernatural, the moon waxing and wanning felt so familiar to me. I felt I was home.
Witch for me is more than black cats, brooms, Halloween, etc. It is the wisdom that is grown through life experiences and the spiritual connection to the Creator of all of this. Being a child born from an American mother of black, native american, and caucasian ancestry and a father from West Africa (Liberia to be more exact) who is of African and Middle Eastern ancestry, my witchydom...yeah...you'll see I like to make up crazy words...LOL...my witchydom may not be something that would be familiar like Wiccan or Pagan religions. I do pull from my ancestors and my cultures. Being a solitary witch is easy for me. I don't want to be boxed into certain ways of beliefs my spirit is too broad and expansive to be pinned down to any one belief system. The best advice I'd received is follow your spirit.
I am a multiracial (African, Native American, and Middle Eastern) witch which can make for an interesting blend of beliefs that I hold for myself. I am a solitary multiracial eclectic witch to be more exact. Still trying to figure out the eclectic part...is that the hippie, tree-hugging spirit that I possess...idk...oh well...if having a strong connection to the spirit of Mama Earth and the Universe or Multiverses is eclectic then yes I am.
I am trying to find my place in this lifetime. I sometimes feel like a square amongst round circles or a circle amongst squares depending on what side of the bed I get out of in the morning. How did I know I was a witch? I think I knew I was different when I started being aware of my own existence as a child. I was a "weird" little one. I was told by family that I lived in my head a lot. It was hard to reach me at times. My imgaination was my connection to the spirit world, but I didn't know that at the time. As children, we are emotional and visual...we see it and feel it as it is...our communication to the world is far different than how we communicate as adults with extensive complex vocabulary. Children communicate through feeling because the spirit is still connected to Source energy (Goddess/God Energy).
I would see spirits like I would see anyone else in a room. I remember as a child a woman dressed in white would look over my brother and I as we slept. She never spoke just looked at us. I didn't feel fear; I was just curious about her. I'd also dreamed about people and situations. I'd even dreamed the death of my beloved grandmother. My mother started to tell me to keep things to myself out of her own sanity and also to protect me from being made fun of or misunderstood. It was hard to fit into any family or school dynamic when people in your immediate circle don't have these "strange" occurrences. My love of books introduced me to withcraft. I was 8 years old when I had a word for what I felt like: WITCH. Those stories that I would read about the supernatural, the moon waxing and wanning felt so familiar to me. I felt I was home.
Witch for me is more than black cats, brooms, Halloween, etc. It is the wisdom that is grown through life experiences and the spiritual connection to the Creator of all of this. Being a child born from an American mother of black, native american, and caucasian ancestry and a father from West Africa (Liberia to be more exact) who is of African and Middle Eastern ancestry, my witchydom...yeah...you'll see I like to make up crazy words...LOL...my witchydom may not be something that would be familiar like Wiccan or Pagan religions. I do pull from my ancestors and my cultures. Being a solitary witch is easy for me. I don't want to be boxed into certain ways of beliefs my spirit is too broad and expansive to be pinned down to any one belief system. The best advice I'd received is follow your spirit.
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