I had written in my Facebook post about trying not to take things personal. I want to eloborate further with this because we all go through circumstances where we are in a situation that an afront has occurred to us which can be taken personally. It did happen to our person...right?
This reminds of a convesation I had a few years back with a wise man who I had admired greatly and still do admire even though we have slowly stopped communicating. He told me not to take it personally...which I couldn't understand because how could I NOT take it personal I was feeling hurt. I can now see what he meant by that statement he said. I had to remove myself mentally and emotionally from the situation and look at it from the outside.
The hurt and/or anger you are feeling is because you have internalized a behavoiur that someone is projecting from their being...it could go from having someone stand you up, someone not supporting your dreams, someone calling you a nasty name, etc. We have to take a step back and say that that person's behaviour is not about me. They are experiencing something that has nothing to do with me. Now we all know that we don't live in an isolated bubble and we all affect each other in many ways, but we can control how we react or don't react when we are headed into uncomfortable territory where someone's experience may arouse our demons. When a demon is roused, it can run amok if you don't take the reins and control it.
This is where we have to consciously be aware of our behaviour in those situations. It's very easy to fall in line with taking it personal if we feed into something that has nothing to do with us. Ask the questions...Why am I hurt and/or angry? Has my behaviour made the situation worse? How can I consciously shift my mind to see the situation is not personal to me? Be brutually honest with yourself. Being an extremely sensitive person, I am going through something like this. I have to learn to stop reacting to people's behaviour. I have to take the situation and see what is the lesson I need to learn without it being personal to me. To make a conscious decisions not let someone else's situation/behaviour affect me. To protect my mind and spirit to where I can be effective in my daily life and the people I encounter. I guess my learning in this is to let it go and give it to the Universe/Goddess/God to take care of it.
Tuesday, February 5, 2013
Friday, November 9, 2012
Pause........
Wow...It's been almost a year since I've posted on my blog. I've just been living life. I've moved to a beautiful town where I'm surrounded by countryside (very happy about that). I'm still trying to figure out how to get more traffic to my blog...I guess it will happen if it's suppose to happen. So I'll just look at my blog as my open diary to the world at this point.
Recently, I have been going through a spiritual stagnation. BLAAAAAAH....oh how I hate this feeling. I've been trying to shake it off but it feels like a rollercoaster I have to endure until the ride is over. I have so much going on inside my head. I should be trying to do something but I'm paused...I think I'm paused for a reason. Trying to figure out what it is. I think everything happens for a reason and this is one of those moments.
I think my body needs pause as well that's why my spirit is in pause. I may need to remove myself from all of the hectic stimulation that my mind and body are dealing with right now.
Recently, I have been going through a spiritual stagnation. BLAAAAAAH....oh how I hate this feeling. I've been trying to shake it off but it feels like a rollercoaster I have to endure until the ride is over. I have so much going on inside my head. I should be trying to do something but I'm paused...I think I'm paused for a reason. Trying to figure out what it is. I think everything happens for a reason and this is one of those moments.
I think my body needs pause as well that's why my spirit is in pause. I may need to remove myself from all of the hectic stimulation that my mind and body are dealing with right now.
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
Spirits Invading Dreams???
Can a spirit invade dreams? I've been asking myself that question recently. I've always had spiritual dreams as long as I could remember, but my recent dreams are standing out more. I don't know why I'm taking notice to these dreams, but I've been having people approach me in my dreams about events going on in my life when I'm awake.
One dream I had was in a neighborhood where there were stores and vendors lined up on both sides of the street. I happened to see this Afro-latino couple who owned a small shop. The man's wife approached me and grabbed my hand so I couldn't let go. She was a beautiful dark-skinned woman and her husband looked almost white. She told me to come into her shop that her husband could give me a reading. I had politely told her no but she wouldn't let go of my hand and started to walk me to her shop. She was telling me in a calming way that he was there to help me. Out of curosity I followed her into this shop. The shop did look like a typical ethnic spiritual shop that you would see in the hood. Her husband approached me, took my arm, and started to talk about how he was a priest and how great he was at his craft. Just bragging so I opened up to him about some things that were bothering in my spiritual path and he walked me to the back of the shop. He had some kind of beans or shells and incense burning all in this woven basket. He started throwing those beans or shells around and I didn't feel right. His wife was just steady staring and smiling all weird at me. He was starting to talk to me about my path. He was telling me that I should listen to him because he could help me with my spirituality. He so braggalicious with it and I felt like I told him too much. I didn't know this man from a can of paint. I felt exposed and started to leave. I had interrupted him and told them no thank you and left the store.
Another night I'd dreamed that these 3 women were asking me about who was the man I'm seeing. What was his name? I woke up shocked that I was asked something like that and how did they know I was seeing someone.
A more recent dream of mine was I was with one of my friends and I was telling her how I wanted to buy some crystals. We happened upon this store where this white guy worked and lived there. My friend said let's go in it looks like this place may have the crystals you're looking for, so I was like okay and we went in. This place looked like a mixture of a house and store. It was really nice looking. The guy approached us and asked how he could help us. I asked him if he had any citrine and amethyst. He was a little cocky and told me that he had citrine but I didn't need the amethyst. I told him I would like to see the citrine but I was still going to get the amethyst somewhere else then. He showed me the citrine on one of his shelves. It was shaped like an obelisk. I went to hold it and he stopped me before I could touch it and said that there really isn't anything special about you. Don't worry you're just an ordinary girl and that there were spirits in his house and he knew I wouldn't be able to see them and I should be happy that I wasn't like that. I looked at him bewildered because while he was saying that to me I saw a shadow spirit in the figure of a man peeking its head at me in his foyer. I didn't say anything to him and I just left.
Spirits do live in an etheral realm/dimension and along side of us. They can see our lives to an extent. I say to an extent because these spirits may have had pieces of the information but not all hence them asking me questions. Spirits like people can come to into our lives to help give direction that we need or to divert/distract us from our path. In sleep our minds are open to these other realms that may not be apparent in our conscious state. The thin veil is gone. I still question if this is my subconscious giving me messages or an actual invasion because of the circumstances...I don't know.
One dream I had was in a neighborhood where there were stores and vendors lined up on both sides of the street. I happened to see this Afro-latino couple who owned a small shop. The man's wife approached me and grabbed my hand so I couldn't let go. She was a beautiful dark-skinned woman and her husband looked almost white. She told me to come into her shop that her husband could give me a reading. I had politely told her no but she wouldn't let go of my hand and started to walk me to her shop. She was telling me in a calming way that he was there to help me. Out of curosity I followed her into this shop. The shop did look like a typical ethnic spiritual shop that you would see in the hood. Her husband approached me, took my arm, and started to talk about how he was a priest and how great he was at his craft. Just bragging so I opened up to him about some things that were bothering in my spiritual path and he walked me to the back of the shop. He had some kind of beans or shells and incense burning all in this woven basket. He started throwing those beans or shells around and I didn't feel right. His wife was just steady staring and smiling all weird at me. He was starting to talk to me about my path. He was telling me that I should listen to him because he could help me with my spirituality. He so braggalicious with it and I felt like I told him too much. I didn't know this man from a can of paint. I felt exposed and started to leave. I had interrupted him and told them no thank you and left the store.
Another night I'd dreamed that these 3 women were asking me about who was the man I'm seeing. What was his name? I woke up shocked that I was asked something like that and how did they know I was seeing someone.
A more recent dream of mine was I was with one of my friends and I was telling her how I wanted to buy some crystals. We happened upon this store where this white guy worked and lived there. My friend said let's go in it looks like this place may have the crystals you're looking for, so I was like okay and we went in. This place looked like a mixture of a house and store. It was really nice looking. The guy approached us and asked how he could help us. I asked him if he had any citrine and amethyst. He was a little cocky and told me that he had citrine but I didn't need the amethyst. I told him I would like to see the citrine but I was still going to get the amethyst somewhere else then. He showed me the citrine on one of his shelves. It was shaped like an obelisk. I went to hold it and he stopped me before I could touch it and said that there really isn't anything special about you. Don't worry you're just an ordinary girl and that there were spirits in his house and he knew I wouldn't be able to see them and I should be happy that I wasn't like that. I looked at him bewildered because while he was saying that to me I saw a shadow spirit in the figure of a man peeking its head at me in his foyer. I didn't say anything to him and I just left.
Spirits do live in an etheral realm/dimension and along side of us. They can see our lives to an extent. I say to an extent because these spirits may have had pieces of the information but not all hence them asking me questions. Spirits like people can come to into our lives to help give direction that we need or to divert/distract us from our path. In sleep our minds are open to these other realms that may not be apparent in our conscious state. The thin veil is gone. I still question if this is my subconscious giving me messages or an actual invasion because of the circumstances...I don't know.
Monday, December 5, 2011
Walking the Way of the Spirit
I am currently searching for a walking stick. This is not just any stick. This stick will be the one that calls my spirit to it. It has been a while since I took one of my nature walks. The holiday season and the change in weather (winter feeling approaching) has been my excuse not to do some of the things I usually do when connecting to mama earth and her universal elements. Well my old soul is not letting me get off the hook that easily.
I had been in a sort of spiritual hibernation (yes even Spirit needs rest), and now I am waking from it. When dealing with matters of the universe and nature, I rely heavily on my old soul that has lived many spiritual past lives, the ancestors, and spirit guides. When my soul speaks, I have to listen. Sometimes I can be lazy when having to do a task that will help me to elevate spiritually in this lifetime. My spirit resounds loudly and repeatedly to me where it can be hard to focus on daily life that I have to perform spiritual rituals to fulfill my soul.
With walking sticks, they are used in ritual work/magic, symbols of authority, record keeping via carvings in the stick, etc. There are even references to staffs/sticks used in spiritual work in the bible. Ritual sticks are used by spiritual priests/priestesses in traditional religions (shaman, root work, paganism, African traditional religions, etc.).
What the stick will be for me is a representation in my spiritual journey or whatever my spirit wants it to be for me at intervals in my life. Being an electic shamanic solitary witch of color, I have many spiritual bases to pull from in my journey. I rely on all of my foundations to guide me in the direction that I need to go. I look forward to my journey to connect to nature and listen when my spirit calls me to work.
Blessed be to you all on your journeys....
I had been in a sort of spiritual hibernation (yes even Spirit needs rest), and now I am waking from it. When dealing with matters of the universe and nature, I rely heavily on my old soul that has lived many spiritual past lives, the ancestors, and spirit guides. When my soul speaks, I have to listen. Sometimes I can be lazy when having to do a task that will help me to elevate spiritually in this lifetime. My spirit resounds loudly and repeatedly to me where it can be hard to focus on daily life that I have to perform spiritual rituals to fulfill my soul.
With walking sticks, they are used in ritual work/magic, symbols of authority, record keeping via carvings in the stick, etc. There are even references to staffs/sticks used in spiritual work in the bible. Ritual sticks are used by spiritual priests/priestesses in traditional religions (shaman, root work, paganism, African traditional religions, etc.).
What the stick will be for me is a representation in my spiritual journey or whatever my spirit wants it to be for me at intervals in my life. Being an electic shamanic solitary witch of color, I have many spiritual bases to pull from in my journey. I rely on all of my foundations to guide me in the direction that I need to go. I look forward to my journey to connect to nature and listen when my spirit calls me to work.
Blessed be to you all on your journeys....
Monday, November 7, 2011
Well it's been a while since I've been on my blog. Just been doing some personal introspection, enjoying family and friends, and getting ready for the upcoming holidays. Times are so hard out here. I remember a few years back milk was just about $2-2.50 a gallon, bread was about $1.50 a loaf...now it's like milk is just about $4 a gallon and bread is almost $3...that may not seem like such a big deal...but "little things" like these add up especially when a household (working class to almost nonexistant middle class) has one income provider for the family and companies are not adjusting their compensation to the cost of living.
I've stopped watching the news a couple of years ago (another subject I would love to go into later...I just think that major network "news" stations are just another arm of fat cat corporations to keep their agendas going and we the so-called critical thinking society are suppose to just believe everything they tell us...but alas the corporations know the simple gulliable american mind of a sheep society) so I'm not up to date on the supposed recession that feels more like a depression to me, because I definitely feel depressed sometimes that I can't provide myself and my child the basic necessities without robbing Peter to pay Paul. I know a lot of people are feeling the same way I'm feeling. I've begrudgingly started looking for a second job. I really didn't want to go down this road because being a working mom, I cherish the little time I have with my child everyday to catch up on his day at school, having dinner together, enjoy seeing him doing sports and karate, just being a mom before he goes off to bed for us to start another long day of work and school.
I didn't know it would be this hard trying to find a secondary job for supplemental income. Walmart has a waiting list where I live, I've had to go on 3 separate interviews for a salesperson position at a major retail store at a nearby mall (didn't get the job...scratching my head on that one), I've even started to look for work at home jobs. Many of their websites forewarned me of their waiting lists and don't hold my breath if I thought I would start working right away (I've applied anyway...won't be holding my breath but I will check my email for an assignment if ever I'm a thought in their mind).
I remain hopeful. The spiritual voice inside of me is telling me this is just a momentary setback, and it will get better soon, so I try not to stress too much. My son is learning the word budget (he doesn't like that word at all...LOL). Hey maybe I'll lose some weight on the budget diet as well. I'm grateful that I have my health and my family to support me. I know there are people out there who may have less than what I have and I do appreciate what I do have. I hope we can all find a way to be able to provide for our families so we can stop letting this parasitic economy drain us of our emotional, mental, and spiritual well-being. Please stay prayed up no matter what your spiritual and/or religious beliefs are. Keep harmony and balance; we are no good to others if we are not at our best. Take care of you in order to take care of the ones you love.
I've stopped watching the news a couple of years ago (another subject I would love to go into later...I just think that major network "news" stations are just another arm of fat cat corporations to keep their agendas going and we the so-called critical thinking society are suppose to just believe everything they tell us...but alas the corporations know the simple gulliable american mind of a sheep society) so I'm not up to date on the supposed recession that feels more like a depression to me, because I definitely feel depressed sometimes that I can't provide myself and my child the basic necessities without robbing Peter to pay Paul. I know a lot of people are feeling the same way I'm feeling. I've begrudgingly started looking for a second job. I really didn't want to go down this road because being a working mom, I cherish the little time I have with my child everyday to catch up on his day at school, having dinner together, enjoy seeing him doing sports and karate, just being a mom before he goes off to bed for us to start another long day of work and school.
I didn't know it would be this hard trying to find a secondary job for supplemental income. Walmart has a waiting list where I live, I've had to go on 3 separate interviews for a salesperson position at a major retail store at a nearby mall (didn't get the job...scratching my head on that one), I've even started to look for work at home jobs. Many of their websites forewarned me of their waiting lists and don't hold my breath if I thought I would start working right away (I've applied anyway...won't be holding my breath but I will check my email for an assignment if ever I'm a thought in their mind).
I remain hopeful. The spiritual voice inside of me is telling me this is just a momentary setback, and it will get better soon, so I try not to stress too much. My son is learning the word budget (he doesn't like that word at all...LOL). Hey maybe I'll lose some weight on the budget diet as well. I'm grateful that I have my health and my family to support me. I know there are people out there who may have less than what I have and I do appreciate what I do have. I hope we can all find a way to be able to provide for our families so we can stop letting this parasitic economy drain us of our emotional, mental, and spiritual well-being. Please stay prayed up no matter what your spiritual and/or religious beliefs are. Keep harmony and balance; we are no good to others if we are not at our best. Take care of you in order to take care of the ones you love.
Friday, September 2, 2011
Dating In the New Millenium
How did dating become so difficult? I have always heard of stories from our grandparents generation how they were married for 50+ years and they barely knew each other before they even walked down the aisle. On the other hand, I and many of my married friends were considered lucky if we even made it past the 7 year itch (5 years for more of us). I and a growing number of my friends are now in the divorce or never been married zone. We truly made a huge leap from long term marriages to the "I hope we can make it past the 1st date" scenario...oy vey!
I've digressed a little bit...back to dating. When I was in my twenties, dating wasn't so much work sort of speak. You were in it to have fun and enjoy the other person's company. If you clicked, that was just the icing on the cake. My dating experiences back then were hit or miss...you'd met your duds or you'd met your gems...it's the rolling of the dice when meeting new people. I'd met some okay guys that turned into longterm commitments and some that if ever I saw them, I would do a swan dive behind the nearest car praying they didn't see me...smh...LOL.
Now it's the new millenium, I'm older and hopefully wiser. I've noticed that dating isn't as easy for me as it was when I was "hot and poppin"...yeah I said that...LOL...I have no tolerance for bullshit and game playing, so my dating life had been few and far between. I'd listened to my instincts more and stopped giving people unworthy props because they had "potential" that they didn't use nor planned on using. I've done blind dates, online dating, just walking down the street hoping someone will bump into me and we'll instantly fall in love (like I've seen on my favorite Lifetime shows)... hell I've even entertained the thought of a prearranged marriage and/or polygamy...yeah I was getting a little desperate towards the end. I'm always hearing from people: "he'll be there when you'll least expect it"...Okay...so I've kinda pretended I wasn't looking but I kind of cheated by trying to look for him by not looking for him so he can find me just in case we walked by each other and missed our window of opportunity...I know that sounds crazy but hey I ain't getting any younger here.
Stories from my single girlfriends aren't any happier either. Is there any hope for us...the older sexy generation... to find a life partner in today's time of instant gratification, overstimulation, and too many options that men are encountering in the technological dating age. Let's face it, the internet is not helping in our dating relationships...there are couples who have broken up because one was obsessed with being online constantly. Facebook and other social media give us far too many visual options. It's like the candy store for people to window shop for liasons/hook-ups. I'm like Erykah Badu "an analog girl in digital world". It seems there is no place for old-fashioned values in today's hypersexualized reality where you can get the milk, the cow, and the farm by taking low expectation/ low standard having women to McDonald's or Whole Foods (inside joke...LOL) where they will easliy give it up for a Big Mac...wtf...is this what quality women are competing against...the easy lay...in my Fred Sanford voice "Elizabeth honey, I'm coming to join you."
One thing we can do to ease the dating frustration is to open up our options to guys that we would normally not be with in our preference zone (height, skin tone, race, religious and/or spiritual backgrounds, etc.). We never want to block our blessings by being too rigid in what we're looking for in a partner, but don't be stupid either settling for the lazy guy that thinks just being in your presence once in awhile for his own selfish reasons is enough to satisfy you. I've had couples tell me that they never thought they would end up with the person they are with now and how funny fate can play a role in their happiness. Say hi to that nerdy guy, you never know he'll probably treat you like a queen that you deserve to be and may make the best husband for you.
To my fellow sisters in the dating jungle trying to find long lasting productive relationships...keep your heads up and don't sacrifice your values just to have a warm body next to you. Any man that will find appealing a woman that will give of herself so easily for so little in return, you don't want as a life partner. It speaks VOLUMES of the man's character as well. The shear laziness and misogynistic view that those type of men have about women will be detrimental to your well-being. Just remember birds of a feather flock together. RUN if a guy can't respect your boundaries and wants to only think of his own selfish desires at your expense. I still have hope that there are "analog guys in a digital world" as well. Let's just try to attune our antennas to send and receive the signal for each other. (NOTE: If any guy take offense to this, then you are that asshole)
I've digressed a little bit...back to dating. When I was in my twenties, dating wasn't so much work sort of speak. You were in it to have fun and enjoy the other person's company. If you clicked, that was just the icing on the cake. My dating experiences back then were hit or miss...you'd met your duds or you'd met your gems...it's the rolling of the dice when meeting new people. I'd met some okay guys that turned into longterm commitments and some that if ever I saw them, I would do a swan dive behind the nearest car praying they didn't see me...smh...LOL.
Now it's the new millenium, I'm older and hopefully wiser. I've noticed that dating isn't as easy for me as it was when I was "hot and poppin"...yeah I said that...LOL...I have no tolerance for bullshit and game playing, so my dating life had been few and far between. I'd listened to my instincts more and stopped giving people unworthy props because they had "potential" that they didn't use nor planned on using. I've done blind dates, online dating, just walking down the street hoping someone will bump into me and we'll instantly fall in love (like I've seen on my favorite Lifetime shows)... hell I've even entertained the thought of a prearranged marriage and/or polygamy...yeah I was getting a little desperate towards the end. I'm always hearing from people: "he'll be there when you'll least expect it"...Okay...so I've kinda pretended I wasn't looking but I kind of cheated by trying to look for him by not looking for him so he can find me just in case we walked by each other and missed our window of opportunity...I know that sounds crazy but hey I ain't getting any younger here.
Stories from my single girlfriends aren't any happier either. Is there any hope for us...the older sexy generation... to find a life partner in today's time of instant gratification, overstimulation, and too many options that men are encountering in the technological dating age. Let's face it, the internet is not helping in our dating relationships...there are couples who have broken up because one was obsessed with being online constantly. Facebook and other social media give us far too many visual options. It's like the candy store for people to window shop for liasons/hook-ups. I'm like Erykah Badu "an analog girl in digital world". It seems there is no place for old-fashioned values in today's hypersexualized reality where you can get the milk, the cow, and the farm by taking low expectation/ low standard having women to McDonald's or Whole Foods (inside joke...LOL) where they will easliy give it up for a Big Mac...wtf...is this what quality women are competing against...the easy lay...in my Fred Sanford voice "Elizabeth honey, I'm coming to join you."
One thing we can do to ease the dating frustration is to open up our options to guys that we would normally not be with in our preference zone (height, skin tone, race, religious and/or spiritual backgrounds, etc.). We never want to block our blessings by being too rigid in what we're looking for in a partner, but don't be stupid either settling for the lazy guy that thinks just being in your presence once in awhile for his own selfish reasons is enough to satisfy you. I've had couples tell me that they never thought they would end up with the person they are with now and how funny fate can play a role in their happiness. Say hi to that nerdy guy, you never know he'll probably treat you like a queen that you deserve to be and may make the best husband for you.
To my fellow sisters in the dating jungle trying to find long lasting productive relationships...keep your heads up and don't sacrifice your values just to have a warm body next to you. Any man that will find appealing a woman that will give of herself so easily for so little in return, you don't want as a life partner. It speaks VOLUMES of the man's character as well. The shear laziness and misogynistic view that those type of men have about women will be detrimental to your well-being. Just remember birds of a feather flock together. RUN if a guy can't respect your boundaries and wants to only think of his own selfish desires at your expense. I still have hope that there are "analog guys in a digital world" as well. Let's just try to attune our antennas to send and receive the signal for each other. (NOTE: If any guy take offense to this, then you are that asshole)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)